…and all I got was this t-shirt.

If there was a biography about you, what would the title be?

That’s the title. We all know how the ride life can be. Some of us are gripping the “oh shit” handle while the car hits a sharp curve, some of us are bumping into things and swearing we didn’t see the pothole in the road, and then there are those of us who are riding until the wheels fall off.

The wheels on this vehicle are a little rickety. But that’s okay, we have a long way yet to go.

I had this thought, for the second time this year: danger is the spice of life. And I have to correct myself every damn time because no it is not. Lol I can only speak for myself.

Thrill seeking is cool, but all out danger…. Nope.

My life’s story would detail the many instances where I put myself in danger and the many ways I managed to escape it. Yeah… self-inflicted danger is pretty much the craziness it sounds like.

It would also tell the terrible tales of true terror by recounting my run ins with tiny human megalomaniacs. The terrible twos are famed for a reason and so is the traumatic terrifying tension of teen rearing. I’ve done it twice and twice was enough for me.

And when all was said and done, we’d cap off our story with how I defeated the mean dragon procrastination and how it hoards and obsesses on overthinking… a diabolical debilitating deterrent to all writers and those of their ilk.

Yep.

Or maybe I could just not and wear the shirt  as a form of advertisement for life. “Try it, you’ll like it.” “Lifetime guarantee. If you’re not satisfied, we’ll give you the best therapist money can buy!”

That’s where I’m at. Therapy because life. It ain’t all shits n giggles. Some major stuff happens in the midst of living life that we have to deal with. And life is about more than self care and coping mechanisms. And therapy and groups.

Where is love in the midst of heartache? Faith in the midst of doubt? Where is joy in the middle of your sadness? Because thank God, you made it out. Out of grief, out of the fire, out of the time that seems to expire (all too quickly).

If I could just… get out of my head just for a little while and enjoy the peace of silence. Because everyday is loud and grows louder with pressure. I should be a diamond right now. But I am me. A woman with torn wings and worse for wear. My halo is crooked with a dent and scratches on it. And my feathers are dingy.

But I’m still kicking… amazingly still kicking.

I’m living life…. *insert title here*

The world is in need of good humans. 

Be one. ❤️

💋

(I realize this is all over the place. Forgive me. I feel better after having made this post, try to find the diamonds in there if you can.  Lol)